Past Lives, Passion, Power and Pssed off Shrews
by RicardianScholar Clark-Weasley
Summary: in the afterlife you remember a lot more than the life you lived but the life you lived before. Shakespeare Retold/Charles II crossover.


**Author's Note: I've fallen into a bit of a Taming of the Shrew obsession, most specifically the Shakespeare Retold version when I discovered that Charles II: The Power and The Passion not only had Rufus Sewell as king but Shirley Henderson as queen. Though the Charles/Catherine ship wasn't as passionate as Petruchio/Kate, it was still sweet and I couldn't resist this fic...**

He greeted her with a kiss and that was when everything fell into place.

Katherine Minola, second female Prime Minster for five terms died barely a month after her husband Petruchio did. Some said it was the heartbreak of losing said husband, her sons and grandchildren scoffed at the idea, as much as she loved Petruchio their mother was very capable of living without him. It was simply old age that killed her.

Petruchio pulled away with a smirk that she instantly wiped away with a slap.

"What was that for?" he yelped clutching his cheek. His promise of hitting her back harder was momentarily forgotten.

"Cheating bastard! Scum! Perverted long haired pillock!" she hissed.

"Kate, that is highly unjust! I haven't cheated on since I died the first time round, haven't I been faithful to you since we married in this life?"

She scowled at him, her arms crossed and he had to suppress the urge to drag her in the nearest secluded place and shag her brains out. "I've wanted to do that since the first time round," she informed him.

"No you didn't, you weren't bad tempered back then," Petruchio muttered rubbing his cheek. Her glare instantly reminded him when she was first mad at him. He then remembered despite her kinder and more polite disposition when they were royalty; she still had a tantrum over him placing his mistress in her household. "Ok, I'm mistaken you were a bad-tempered prude even back then."

"And you're still the same flamboyant, vain, idiotic, fucking p-"

He interrupted her with a kiss and they were very distracted for a good few minutes before the strange need to breathe caused them to pull away. Strange that even in death they needed to breathe, must be some sort of permanent habit.

"Kate, sweet Kate, my Kate," he cooed, "I was a king back then, it was expected me to seek pleasure with others when you couldn't give me an heir. Doesn't mean I never loved you, you know how much I loved you even back then. That's why we gotten our second chance, to be more faithful and enjoy each other more."

She rolled her eyes. "You're still a pillock. You better not have taken the advantage of your mistresses being around when I was still alive."

"I haven't even looked at them," he swore.

"Because if you have I'll rip their hair out, especially Barbra. I don't mind seeing Nell or that French cry-baby but if I see that convening, slutty cow then I'll make her wish she never set eyes on you."

Petruchio was suddenly very glad that he hadn't bumped into any of his mistresses since he died the second time round.

Suddenly another thought came to him. "Hey, why did you get to keep your name and I didn't? Why did I have to have a name like Petruchio?"

"Obviously our deluded mothers had an interest in Taming of the Shrew, well your mother; I think mine still believes Shakespeare is some sort of cocktail."

"And you got to be ruler of the country this time round!"

"Welcome to the twenty first century, karma to all the macho bullshit you lot put us through the first time round."

"Love you too, darling," Petruchio muttered sarcastically. Then he grinned, "We had our children this time round."

She struggled to keep her smile off her face. The fact that she was a good fifteen years older than she was the first time round made it all the sweeter. She didn't just give him one son in this life but three, at the same time. Suck on that Barbra Villars.

"You know..." he half purred and she suddenly needed to change her knickers.

"Yes?"

"There's a cupboard over there, it's been a long time and I missed you."

"Why not just take me right here," she suggested slyly.

A cough made her notice for the first time a plain, easily unnoticed, man dressed plainly. "Ah yes, that's the guardian of the gates of this afterlife. I forgot he was there, not the best conversationalist. In fact I don't remember ever talking to him..."

"If you're gonna shag," the guardian said, "please do it in your afterlife and not here"

Katherine allowed herself to be dragged into a new world for some good old fashioned shagging by her horny impatient husband. She couldn't help but snigger at his muttered insults, "stupid eunuch, asexual, never getting any, guardian..."


End file.
